100 Days of Movement

100 Days Keep moving

Hello, Everyone!

It has been a while since my last blog post, but here I am. While I haven’t been on here in a while I have been posting daily on my main facebook page. Today is day 100 of what I have been calling #keepmoving.

What is #keepmoving? 

It is a journey that I began 100 days ago. I began this journey in hopes of getting better at dealing with depression. In a past post, I have mentioned the fact that I have been battling depression off and on since the age of twelve. As you can imagine, battling depression and keeping up with a fully energized toddler doesn’t go hand in hand. On her second birthday, as I watched her open presents, I silently vowed to get better. I spent months in prayer and one day while she was sleeping I thought back to ways I dealt with depression pre-motherhood. I remembered loving to run, walk, and simply being out in nature; which was something I hadn’t done in quite some time. When she woke up I grabbed her stroller and went for a run and that is when my #keepmoving journey unintentionally began.

What did I do?

This journey was about more than just running. It was a journey that I was going to take with my daughter by my side. I made up in my mind that I would get better and not put motherhood on the back burner. I knew that if my daughter was going to be with me then I needed to make sure that fun and enjoyable things were happening. She likes being pushed in the stroller but even that can get boring. On March 29, we began walking and running. Eventually, that evolved into playing outside, chasing bunnies, going for walks, going swimming, running errands by foot, floor exercises indoors, lifting weights, dancing, or whatever I could come up with that day.

Depression Today

As you probably guessed, no I am not 100 free of depression but I can honestly say that I feel so much better. Before this 100 day adventure, it was hard to get out of bed. I used to wake up each day telling myself that I had to get up, but now I want to get up. I look forward to what the day might bring. I now look forward to what my daughter and I might do during the day. She loves to be outdoors and so do I but even on rainy days we make sure to spend that time together.

What’s Next?

The last 100 days were about staying active and I want to continue that. In addition to that, I now intend to stay active and get in shape and that is my goal for the next 100 days. Today I weight 153 pounds and I want to be down to about 135. Disclaimer: I have not consulted with a physician and I am no expert. All I know is what I used to look like and how I felt when I was at my best. I don’t plan on going on some crazy diet. I am simply making one change for now and that is to drink more water daily. If I am honest with you all, I don’t drink nearly enough water and that has got to change.

Stay informed with Dri

I have decided to begin posting these next 100 days on my facebook blog fan page. Oh you didn’t know that I had one? Click here, then click the LIKE button that way you can stay informed. Besides the daily post, I plan to be more active on there in the future.

Thanks again for all of your support! I am so glad that you take out time to read my blog. I have more in store in the future, so please stay tuned until next time.

Many blessings,

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Racism, Hate, and My Toddler.

Hello, everyone.

I remember being a kid in my grandma’s house having a conversation with my daddy. He was doing his best to help me see that the world was a tough place. He wanted me to be prepared to stand on my own two feet. I remember not getting it and wondering why we couldn’t just be nice to other’s regardless of the way that they treated us. I remember asking him why we couldn’t just believe the best in others. I also remember how aggravated he became with me. How he said he gave up and said that one day I would be faced with a situation where all that peaceful talk would go out of the window.

That was many years ago and I have been through quite a few things. I have experienced some unthinkable acts at the hands of “loved ones”. I can’t say that the idea of a peaceful world has remained but I believe that those around me would say that I am a peaceful person. I don’t stir up trouble. You won’t find me in the midst of fights and mess. (I am not judging you if that is your thing. It just isn’t for me). With all that said, I have learned that it is harder to be peaceful when someone messes with my daughter.

{I am sharing all of this to show that I have weaknesses and that God is still working on me. I am going to share two incidents that have challenged that peaceful side.}

The first incident happened a few weeks back when my daughter was playing at the park. We arrived and she was running and having a good time. A little while into playing a sweet little girl named Lilly came up to her and began to play with her. She was so nice and didn’t mind that Abriyannah was only two years old. She talked with Abriyannah and I about school and all kinds of fun things going on in her life. All of a sudden, I hear someone yell, “Lilly, come here right now!” I look to see what was wrong. The lady was an older lady and she looked terrified. She said, “Lilly, come here! You come here right now, quickly!”  Lilly headed over toward her all while telling her about her new friend Abriyannah and how they were playing a game. Once Lilly reaches her, she looks at her and then she says, “Lilly, we don’t play with those people”. It knocked the breath out of me. I couldn’t believe this was happening. At this point, my daughter is trying to get away from me so she can say goodbye to her new friend. I told Abriyannah that her friend had to go, but we will continue to play. She cried at first because she couldn’t say goodbye but soon was better and continued playing.

The second incident happened today (5/21), and I am intentionally keeping it short because I am still heavily emotional about it. I have an elderly neighbor who loves to tell us her opinions and treat them as facts. We naturally do a very good job of staying to ourselves. We don’t keep a lot of company. I consider us to be peaceful, chill neighbors that stay out of everyone’s business. This evening, I took my daughter out to play and my neighbor was out there with other neighbors, their kids, and pets. As soon as I got outside, she told me that my daughter needs to be outside to run and get her energy out. I agreed and proceeded to play with my daughter. She continued to go on and on about how my daughter has too much energy and how she is a problem and people need to “do something about that kid”. Fast forward, she later spoke to my husband and told him that our daughter was stupid.

Deep Sigh!

I say all of this because it saddens me because she is at an age where she doesn’t know that people are being mean to her. She doesn’t know that racism exists and one day she will. She will come home from school and tell me that someone said something upsetting about her. She will cry and ask me if it is true. She will want to know why people are cruel and why anyone wouldn’t want to play with her because of the color of her skin. I wonder if I will have the words needed to convince her that she is more than enough. I wonder if I could hold in the tears and be able to reassure her that she doesn’t need to change for anyone. That her curly fro is beautiful!  That her smile is the best! I wonder if I would be a good example to her in those times.

I am beginning to see that this hurting world is something that I can’t completely protect her from. I know that I will not always know what to say but as long as I have breath in my body she won’t have to go through this life alone.

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**Thanks for reading this post! This is hard to share because I am being so vulnerable. The comment section could fill up with hate. But who knows? Maybe this post helped a mom with the same concerns realize they aren’t the only one.**

God bless you,

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3 Years: Natural Hair & Motherhood

Hello, everyone! Today marks 3 years since I did the big chop.

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This is a picture of me right after I did my big chop. I was four months pregnant and very excited about the new life that was to come. I can honestly say that I have grown so much over these past few years, and so has my hair.

3 years later

I chose to do the big chop for myself. It was all about me becoming comfortable in my own skin. Doing what I felt was right regardless of everyone else’s opinion of me. This really has come in handy with motherhood.

lets go

I have found that people have all kinds of opinions when it comes to how I ought to raise my daughter. I have heard a lot of “you better do this” and “you better stop that”. The funny thing is that some bits of advice contradict other bits of advice that I have received. The same thing goes with my hair. You’d think that it’s just hair but some people take this whole “natural hair community” thing very serious. I have heard “if you are going to be natural you have to follow the rules”. I personally don’t feel it’s that deep. I am just living for me not trying to live for “the community”.

Lenght isn't everything but

This natural hair journey has helped me be a better mother. It has helped me to find a new voice that I did not know I had inside. I have discovered a new side of myself and it is beautiful. Let me introduce you to this woman that I have found:

Loving it

Nowadays, I go by the name Dri. I am a wife, a mother, and I am discovering more about myself each day. I now look into the mirror and a see a beautiful woman because I am no longer lost trying to live up to the expectations of others. I realized that I cannot live up to them and I am okay with that. I have discovered a strength within myself that showed up the day my daughter came into the world and has continued to grow.

guest appearanceI want to encourage you today to live the life that God has destined you to live. Sure, there will be those who disagree and feel you are going about it the wrong way but only you know what God is leading you to do.  It doesn’t matter whether it has to do with your hair, how you are going to raise your children, where you will go to college…etc. Don’t allow man’s opinion to keep you back from living this gift called life.

Thanks for stopping by once again and for your support. I truly appreciate you visiting and sharing my post.  I don’t know what’s next to come but you can be certain that any changes will be done for me.

Stay blessed,

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Every Season, God Is There

Every Season

Hello, Everyone!

Before I became a mom I wondered what it would be like. Actually, I wondered a lot of things but one thing more than others: how would I raise my child right? Everyone has their own way of doing things and raising children is no exception.

I realized that motherhood was a HUGE responsibility, and while I did not know how I was going to be the so-called “perfect mother”, I knew that my womb craved the task. Luckily for us, we got pregnant almost a year after making the decision to become parents.

My pregnancy was like a dream come true (if you ignore the horrible mood swings). I had no morning sickness. I felt like I was right where I belonged in life. There were times when I wondered what life would be like without her inside of me. I honestly cried at the thought of our separation at times. But there were also times when I imagined holding her in my arms, seeing her with he daddy, hearing the sound of her cries…

Ten months of pregnancy, 23 hours of labor, and she was finally here. I thought to myself “I love her so much, but now what?” I wondered things from how do I know why she is crying?-to- How do we provide when we don’t have it?

It has been two years now and I have learned a valuable lesson. When God gave us Abriyannah He did not go anywhere. I think I became so overwhelmed that I was blinded to the fact that this was not something that God was leaving for my husband and me to do alone. God has been there every step of the way. We learned what her cries meant and how to calm her. We also created the perfect work schedule that allowed one of us to be there when the other was at work. And if you are wondering, no, I never became the perfect mother.

Conclusion: I had this silly idea that when I became a mother that Father God would take a back seat and expect me to be the parent that he was to me. God hasn’t gone anywhere and He never will. I can always depend on God to see me through every season of my life. That doesn’t just go for me but for you as well. If you are facing a new season in your life don’t fear. Matthew 28:20 says, “And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age” (ESV).

No matter what season you are in know that God isn’t taking a back seat. He is there with you and He is an active participant in your life.

Stay Blessed,

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When Crumbled Cookies and A Mess Are More Than Enough

As a mother, or a parent in general, it’s easy to find oneself constantly running around. In doing so, I often find myself running low on energy,low on patience, low on sleep, basically low on everything. At times when my daughter is sleeping, I have to decide between washing dishes or taking a shower, doing my hair or folding the ever growing pile of clothes, tidying up or getting a nap.

Sometimes, Crumbled cookies and a Mess are more than enough!

When my daughter was first born, I felt overwhelmingly ungrateful if I were to think anything beyond “what a wonderful gift”. The truth of the matter is that there are times when I do feel overwhelmed. There are times when I want a break for myself and you know what THAT IS OKAY!.

Are you like me?

Do you know how I feel?

For those who do not know the feeling please don’t misunderstand me. I don’t regret having my daughter. Yes, she is a blessing and I would never trade her for anything, but sometimes I do find myself needing that moment to stop and catch my breathe. .

I say all of this in order to be transparent and hopefully encourage other parents out there who maybe struggling with the same feelings. I want you to know that it is okay to want a time out. It doesn’t make you a bad parent, it doesn’t make you ungrateful, it just makes you human.

**With that being said, I don’t just leave my daughter alone when I feel these feelings.Sometimes, all I can do is just close my eyes for a brief moment and say a prayer.**

It really does help to know that God can hear me over my daughter’s screaming. 🙂

Thanks for reading and God bless!

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